When GLBT Employees Should Quit a Toxic Workplace

[bholas]

Many adults spend more time at work than anywhere else -- including home. Colleagues become friends, confidantes, second family members. Occasionally, however, their words and actions are a source of tension, even terror -- especially for gay, lesbian, bi***ual and transgender (GLBT) coworkers.

Is there ever a time when your workplace environment becomes so toxic, quitting is the right thing to do?

Perhaps, says Liz Winfield, principal of Common Ground, a consulting firm specializing in workplace ***ual orientation issues. “I go into every situation feeling I’m as good as anyone,” says Winfield. “If they don’t like me, I’ll fight for my rights. But thousands of people don’t work in circumstances that allow for that activism. You have to balance your responsibilities to yourself and your family with how much you can stand.”

Brian McNaught, a corporate diversity trainer whose books and DVDs are used by corporations throughout the world, agrees there is no easy answer. Many factors influence a decision, such as how out an employee is, whether the company’s antidiscrimination policies include ***ual orientation, and whether the state or municipality has such an ordinance.

Yet even a fish fryer at a Mississippi diner has options, McNaught says. That person “can think about working for a company with policies that prohibit discrimination based on ***ual orientation. (Food and facilities management company) Sodexo has such a policy. You can fry fish for them in a Mississippi corporation or college.”

Wide Variety of Reasons

Of course, “some gay people can’t complain, and they can’t move,” McNaught notes. “They’re being paid minimum wage, they’re not out and they’re stuck in a small town working for a social conservative, because they’re the sole breadwinner for a family that needs to eat.”

McNaught says that if only one person is harassing you, “tell him or her how anti-gay comments affect your work conditions.” If you can’t do that, approach your manager, a human resources professional or the head of a gay employee resource group. If you’re unable to do any of those things -- a reality in the 31 states still lacking ***ual orientation-based protection for workers -- it’s time to decide whether to change jobs. Out & Equal is a good place to research new employers that enforce their nondiscrimination policies.

“In very, very bad situations I’ve seen people come out selectively,” says Winfield. “Even in the most homophobic environment, where anything beyond hetero***uality is out of the ordinary, people pick and choose their spots carefully. Many times the people they come out to respect those one-to-one relationships and make it easier for the gay man or woman.”

Quitting: A Black Mark?

If you do decide to quit, what should you say in your next interview? “Be positive,” advises Eric Bloem, deputy director of the Human Rights Campaign’s Workplace Project. “No one can be faulted for leaving an uncomfortable work environment, no matter what the reason. You could say, ‘I left because of an untenable work situation.’ Or you could be upfront about it. That might even help, if your new company is truly open and affirming.”

McNaught says: “Companies today that seek to attract and retain the best, and employees work hard to create workplaces that are safe and where all employees feel valued. They don’t want to lose people they’ve spent money training and who bring in income. If you are such a person, you’ll have no trouble getting help addressing those conditions, which made you feel unwelcome.”

“If, however, you’re easily expendable, you’ll have a harder time securing the full attention of the HR office, unless it’s headed or staffed by people who passionately believe in the company’s core values,” he says.

So what’s the bottom line: Stay to make a statement, or leave to make a statement?

“Neither is great if the situation remains unresolved,” says Bloem. “Cutting and running certainly doesn’t accomplish much. The organization may want you to leave -- what kind of statement is that?” On the other hand, he admits, “How healthy is it to stay and suffer every day?”

“Quitting makes a short-term statement,” says Winfield. “No one cared three seconds after Jerry Maguire walked. Staying makes a longer-term statement. You don’t have to be an activist; you can make a statement by being the most open, honest per

Similar Threads:

• Toxic Networking
• Time manager’s workplace -No possible entries help available for this time
• Supplier Workplace
• Top 5 Topics Never to Discuss at WorkPlace